and I learn about stuff in my own little myopic world: families crumbling.... cancer progressing... moms leaving, daddies cheating...
and it is hard to reconcile all this... it's difficult to understand... I want to apply a 'cause' to every 'effect', but it doesn't always add up.
yeah, I suppose one could see (through 20/20 hindsight, of course) how this flirtation or that stray look or that 'what if' thought could lead to cheating and disappointment and hurt and separation. ...or how ignoring the family to climb one more ladder rung could lead to resentment and loss.
but what do I do with a 17 yr old in a coma after a car accident which he couldn't avoid? or a dying momma succumbing to the ravages of cancer?
I am not sure.
But I pray every day that God continue to build a hedge around my family... and that His Spirit give me strength to fortify the wall around my heart with prayer and Bible study.
At the end of the day, I just have to understand that I don't understand. So I have to fix my mind on Him and surround myself with His people and do everything in my power to stay vigilant and watchful... to avoid temptation when I see it and pray God's protection when I don't see it.
and i have to believe He is in control. ....that the sovereign God of the universe who sent His only Son to die for me knows what I need. and provides it.
Blessings!
