I feel small

Today I feel small... I look around and see all that needs to be done for His cause, and I am overwhelmed. I sense I should be energetic and on fire, and I am neither. The need is so great and I am inept and unable...

There are people who need God, and I am failing miserably to show Him to them.

What am I to do?

I find myself trying to satisfy this angst with meaningless rote and fruitless ritual; I am trapped by some old belief that it is somehow within my power to 'insure' my own salvation or to 'guarantee' the savedness of those around me...

How can God use someone so morally bankrupt as me?

I am trying to believe that He used a dozen ordinary people to change the world.
I am trying to believe that it is not from ME, but it is from HIM that the power comes.
I am really trying hard to remember that it is in my weakness that HIS Glory shines.
I am trying to remember that it is my job to spread seed, and HIS to provide the results.

but it's hard.